Fathers in Spirit
by Eldhoron
Summary: Elrond angst. The lord of Imladris muses on distant memories of the ellyn that raised him. No slash; just brothers.


**Just some Elrond angst. Thanks to Kim-onka and MistressofImladris for inadvertently inspiring me.**

Elrond laid back into the comfortable embrace of the cushioned chair. The sound of waterfalls roaring in the background was constant, but today they seemed to echo more sweetly than usual. The sky was a brilliant pink hue, spackled with a handful of violet clouds on the horizon. The red sun slowly dipping behind the rim of the Hidden Valley, cast an amazing hue to the waters falling down the grey rocky crags surrounding his home. The rushing foam turned suddenly to golden tresses shining in the last lights of her majesty's setting beyond the edge of the world.

The idyllic scene was one of the most beautiful sights the half-elf had ever laid eyes on. His mind wandered and the lord allowed himself to close his eyes, enjoying the final kisses of the day. His thoughts lifted high above the clouds to rest on the many sweet things that had happened in his lifetime as well as the bitter.

His stepfathers, Maedhros and Maglor, singly deeply a mournful song of the Exile after supper one night replayed through his mind. Maglor's nimble fingers skilfully playing the notes on his harp danced in perfect rhythm to Maedhros' words. Elros, his twin brother, would sit next to Elrond on nights like those and the two kinslayers would not seem so bad. In fact, the brooding ellyn would always stir feelings in Elrond that he had denied for so long.

It was only after this long and losing his brother that Elrond had accepted that the two ellyn had, indeed, loved him and his brother. It had only been too late to tell his adopted parents. The lord wondered where his stepfather, Maglor, had gone… It pained him to think that the ellon that had cared for him would wander the rest of his life alone and desolate. His timing had always been horrible.

Elrond chuckled to himself. Indeed, timing had always been his weakest point. Maybe after this long of life on the earth he had grown somewhat more cautious with the precious grains of eternity he was given, but he could not be so sure. His memory was stirred to the day he had first seen the beautiful elleth he now called his wife. She was lovely and yet he had not had the strength to tell her so until Haldir had pushed him into it.

The elf lord wondered if he would have ever been able to sum up the courage to tell that wondrous elleth what he had felt. He had loved her the moment he had saw her. His stepfathers surfaced in memory once again. Why were they suddenly coming up in his thoughts he knew not, but Elrond did not fight the reflections. The past washed over him.

" _Why don't you have an elleth?" Elros asked innocently to Maedhros._

 _The ellon smiled, but the twins could easily recognise the shadows of pain in his blue-green irises. "I have you two to keep me busy," he said simply._

 _Elrond would have kept it at that but his brother was more curious about the affair than him. "Why doesn't Maglor have an elleth?"_

 _Maedhros smiled again, this time with real mirth adding another layer of depth in his eyes. "Because, ellith are hard to catch when you are constantly singing," he said quietly._

The trio had laughed at that suggestion. Elrond smiled in the present. Finally, he opened his eyes. The sky had fallen into a deep indigo velvet while he had reminisced. The sun was long gone, leaving only a faint hint of crimson on the far horizon. High in the firmament a dazzling gem floated above the world and all of its troubles. A hint of anger flared in Elrond's soul. His jaw ground tightly while the memories were brutally shattered. Recollections long suppressed now came back to the forefront of his mind.

 _Elros held his brother in his arms tightly shielding him from the two blood spattered warriors walking among the carnage. Elrond clutched his brother's form, equally frightened._

 _The two ellyn had noticed them and had stopped, staring for the longest time…_

Elrond had not known that those two would become his parents. The elf lord opened his eyes again, turning his ice blue gaze to the stars that so many held in reverence. To that one which so many deemed the most precious of them all. Sadness overwhelmed the old elf. "Why?" He asked to the night.

An answer would not come. He knew it wouldn't but he still asked for some reason he could never understand. Another memory surfaced one from so long ago on a night similar to this an age away in time.

" _Goodnight, sons," the two brothers spoke as one without thought._

 _A sudden silence filled the room. That was not to be spoken…_

" _Goodnight, edair," the two whispered back._

"Goodnight fathers," Elrond said quietly to the only ones that mattered now. He was somewhat calmed now. He turned his eyes away from the sailing gem, content enough now to drift asleep.


End file.
